Chocolate Bar Review: TJ’s 85% Dark

TJs Lovers Bar


Trader Joe’s The Dark Chocolate Lover’s Chocolate Bar

First, I’d like to say I don’t condone stealing, but how come Trader Joe’s wraps everything in plastic? Do they have a side plastic business that comes out, sight unseen, in a percentage of the costs? Do they think plastic grows on trees (as does this cacao bean that they show on this here package)? Well, whatever, this chocolate is pretty good. It’s described as “smooth & fruity” which sounds like something I’d want in my suntan lotion, you know, because I’m a Mick and I get burned easily. The texture is very smooth and the taste is fruity. One disappointing factor about this chocolate is that, even though it’s sourced in the “Tumaco Region of Colombia,” it’s not fairly traded. What a flippin’ bummer! Another is that it comes in two little wrappers. This may be nice on a hot day in your pocket, but it’s a general TJ’s business-as-usual waste. How can they keep their Hawaiian shirt heads held high? I forget how much this baby costs, but it’s cheap, and that’s probably because they didn’t pay a high price for the beans and for the worker’s wallets down there in Colombia. Eat this chocolate: (1) if you don’t care about the environment or other people, (2) if you are homeless, (3) if you are a vegan and need some iron, (4) if you stole it.

Rating: 5/10 Tasty Morsels